Lately, I have been pondering the difference between mentoring and coaching in the context of leadership development. When I think of mentoring, I see the work of a leader is to share our experience and help point the way for others to follow. In other words, “This is how I navigated my career, and it might help you as well.”
But coaching is different. When we coach, we ask questions – powerful questions – that tend to start with what and how, rather than why. Then, we hold space for our clients to self-discover the answers by tapping into the knowledge we all hold deep within ourselves.
The answers we find may shock us. And may lead us to powerful transformation. I know my answers did.
Several years ago, during a time of personal transition in my life I sought out and worked with a coach. My coach, Bill, asked questions far more often than he gave advice. Come to think of it I don’t know if he ever gave me advice. He asked stimulating questions, then listened deeply and reflected what he heard from me. “What is coming up for you?” he often asked.
After working together for nearly a year, one day I walked into his office and said, “Bill what is coming up for me is ‘no settling’. I have no idea what that means for me.”
Bill guided me with further questions. Less than an hour later, I walked out of his office having proclaimed, “I am going to get a doctorate in leadership in higher education at a major university.”
Then, I skipped to the coffee shop next door and “googled” my proclamation.
There was my next answer – Vanderbilt University’s Doctorate in Higher Education, Leadership and Policy. I applied, got accepted, then moved to Nashville one year later completely transforming my life.
As a coach now, I’ve learned to ask powerful questions. These are a few of my favorites:
What concerns do you about your transition? What excites you?
Can you tell me more?
How might you take the next step?
And of course, with a special thanks to Bill Z,
What is coming up for you?
Powerful questions inspire powerful answers that lead to personal and professional transformation. My last question is this, “What one powerful question transformed your life?” I’d love to hear your answers.
Until next time, Fly high!
Barbara
Want to know more? Or need more questions to power your next move? Drop me a line at captainbarbarabell.com and of course check out my book, Flight Lessons: Navigating Through Life’s Turbulence and Learning to Fly High.
#coaching, #mentoring, #veterans, #leadership,#powerfulquestions
